Thursday, 05 November 2009
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Computer is still at the shop
Thank you Dorky for letting me use your computer! <3
[63 Pictures]
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I'm going to my first dance since grade 6. I'm so nervous. I can't dance, but at least I'll be there with her.
Hopefully I won't break my leg at this one.I love you. There aren't words that can describe how much I do.
I love you I love you I love you I love you.I'll always be here for you. <3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3
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Song of the day!
Song: Happiness Is A Warm Gun
Artist: The Beatles
Wednesday, 04 November 2009
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bored.
Realisations.
1. I've come to realize that my hair:
Fucked
2. I've come to realize that when I talk:
I should stop talking
3. I've come to realize that, when I love someone:
I really really really really do.
4. I've come to realize that I need:
to see her again before I go absolutely insane.
5. I've come to realize that I've lost:
myself.
6. I've come to realize that I hate it when:
I talk.
7. I've come to realize that money:
is stupid and that everything should be free....
8. I've come to realize that people:
are cruel.
9. I've come to realize that I'll always be:
the fucked up one.
10. I've come to realize that I love spending my time with:
my girl
11. I've come to realize that the last time I cried I was:
cutting.
12. I've come to realize that my cell phone is:
never dead anymore.
13. I've come to realize that my friends are:
Amazing.
14. I've come to realize that before I go to sleep at night:
I take my drugs and think about her.
15. I've come to realize that right now I am thinking about:
Why the hell I'm almost crying.
16. I've come to realize that when I get on Facebook:
I stalk people.
17. I've come to realize that today:
was a sleepy day.
18. I've come to realize that tonight I will:
sleep or something...
19. I've come to realize that the last person I kissed is:
awesome, amazing, super, cool take your pick. :)
20. I've come to realize that I'll never be:
what i aspire to be.
Hard.
1. Will you answer every question honestly?
sure
2. Have you ever stayed up all night while drunk or high?
No
3. Have you ever punched anyone in the face?
No.
4. Do you miss anything or anyone?
Yes.
5. What makes you laugh no matter what?
lolcats
6. Have you kissed anyone on the lips within the past five hours?
No. :(
7. Who was the last person you talked to?
Nicole
8. What do you dislike at the moment?
feeling like this for no reason at all.
9. Name one of your friends who is the most like you?
Mel.
Harder.
1. Do you get butterflies around the guys/girls you like?
Yeah.
2. Do you think it is bad to have sex at your age?
No.
3. Will you get married?
I don't really believe in marriage.
4. Will you be doing drugs in the near future?
No, I don't think so.
Very Personal.
1. Are you happy with yourself?
hahahahahaha
2. Would you change yourself for the person you love?
To some degree.
3. What do you tell yourself when times get hard?
repeatedly tell myself I'm okay, without believing it at all.
Secrets.
1. When did you last cry?
Last night.
2. Do you believe in religion?
No.
3. What is currently on your mind?
Melanie.
4. Has a guy ever seriously punched you more than once?
No.
Scandal.
1. Have you done bad things with your parents nearby?
No, not really.
2. Have you started a horrible rumor about somebody?
No.
3. Did you ever fail the school year?
No.
4. Have you ever been too drunk to remember a certain night?
No.
5. Do you think your future will be a good one?
ummm... I hope so.
Deep.
1. Do you think you were raised well?
Yes.
2. Do you have a secret that you've never told ANYONE?
No.
3. How do you handle stress?
Not at all.
4. How would you spend your last day alive?
I don't know...
5. Do you hide things well or do you have a guilty conscience?
Both.
6. If there was true love on one side of the street and a million bucks on the other, which one would you choose?
Love
7. If your parents got divorced and you had to pick mom or dad to live with, who would you choose?
My parents are divorced and I live with my mother. I would never in a million years live with my "father"
8. If you had to choose between having one family member or 5 of your closest friends die who would you
i'd rather it be me than them. < same.
Love.
1. Do you know if you're in love?
Yes.
2. The last time you kissed someone - did you picture yourself with them?
Yes.
3. What’s the most important part of a relationship in your opinion?
Honesty.
4. If your parents didn't like the person you were dating, would you lose them?
No.
Random.
1. Do you spend time with the same people always?
Yes.
2. Do you think best friends can be replaced?
No.
3. Are you the type that would rather stay at other people's houses or have them at yours?
Other people's
4. When is the last time you were truly happy with your life?
100% happy? I don't know.
5. Where was your default facebook picture taken?
It isn't me, it's Metric at Bluesfest.
6. Do you think long distance relationships are ever really worth it?
I don't know, I've never been in one.
7. What is your favorite colour?
I have a bunch.
8. What do you do when you have a bad day?
not enough but too much at the same time.
9. Do you really think exes can be "just friends"?
Depends.
10. Who messaged you last?
Mel
11. When was the last time you told someone you loved them?
4 minutes ago.
12. If you could pack up and leave your life now to move away, would you?
Sure, but only if I can bring her with me.
13. Do you fall for people easily?
Sometimes
14. Are you quick to start a fight?
No.
15. Do your parents really know YOU?
Sometimes I think so. Other times it's like we're on different planets.
16. Lyrics stuck in your head?
Yup.
17. Are you tired?
Not anymore.
18. Any friends you'd like to tell how much you appreciate them?
Yes, but they know who they are.
19. Last time you walked farther than one block?
A couple days ago.
Off The Wall.
1. What curse word do you use the most?
Fuck, shit and damn.
2. Do you ever take medication to help you fall asleep?
Yup, every day since I was 10.
3. Who would you want to be with right now?
Mel.
4. When was the last time you had Starbucks?
Saturday night.
5. Do you think people talk about you behind your back?
Yes.
6. Is anyone in love with you?
Yes.
7. Ever cry in public?
Yes.
8. Are you currently wanting any piercings or tattoos?
Yes.
9. What’s the weather like?
Cold and stupid. :/
10. Would you ever date anyone covered in tattoos?
Yes.
11. Do you pay attention to the calories in the package/box?
Sometimes.
12. Do you use sarcasm?
Yeah.
13. Do you get along better with the same sex or opposite?
Same.
Monday, 02 November 2009
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odsafoijadsfoi
So far no luck with my computer, I've been working on it for about 4 hours today.
I'm going to see my computer guy to see if he can take a look at it. Murr, I had a nice big update ready to go, but I'm not going to update till I get my files back. I don't want to risk losing my restore point by adding pictures or downloading stuff.
Anyway.... In 2 days it'll be 2 months O.o I can't believe it. Already?
I love you, hun! -bigs kisses and hugs and cuddles and stuff-
Sunday, 01 November 2009
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Computer problems, Help!
I've got a problem, I turned off my computer about an hour ago. When I switched it on ALL my settings and files are gone. I've got vista so I tried system restore and it won't let me restore my stuff because my C drive has something wrong with it. It's telling me to do a disk check, but it won't let me... It says to schedule a check and that a scan will start the next time I reboot my computer.
I've restarted my computer 3 times now. Nothing.
If you know how to fix this, please let me know. I have all my homework on this thing and I don't have a backup of my school work on a usb key (hits head on wall repeatedly)Please help.
Ugh... stupid... stupid... stupid... stupid...
Thursday, 29 October 2009
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Sorry....
I'm going to be annoying and post a survey. Then, I'm starting homework... ugh.
When's the last time you ran?
Saturday..
Do your jeans have rips, tears, and holes in them?
I don't actually own jeans...
What are you dreading right now?
Homework
Do you celebrate 420?
No.
Do you get the full 8 hours of sleep a night?
During the weekdays,sometimes. During the weekends, yes.
If anyone came to your house on your "lazy days" what would ya'll do?
Nothing, sit and watch TV.
Who last grabbed your ass?
Mel? or was it Michelle? I don't remember.
Have you ever been on your school's track team?
In grade 6 :)
Do you own a pair of Converse?
I do.
Did you copy and paste this survey?
Yes.
Do you eat raw cookie dough?
No, not really. My sister does.. she buys those Pillsbury cookie dough tubes and it's it with a spoon. lol
Have you ever kicked a vending machine?
Yeah
Don't you hate it when the radio ruins good songs by playing them over and over?
I don't listen to the radio. I only listen to the news, sometimes
Do you watch Trading Spaces?
No.
How do you eat oreos?
Depends, sometimes I twist the cookie part off and take out the white shit inside and eat it. Other times I just eat it whole.
Have you ever stayed online for a very long time waiting for someone?
A couple times.
Are you cocky?
No.
Could you live without a computer?
No.
Do you wear your shoes in the house?
Sometimes.
Who or what sleeps with you?
My heating blanket and my stuffie that looks like a tampon. :)
At what age did you find out that Santa wasn't real?
Ugh... I think I was 6 or 7.
How many phones, house phones and cell phones are in your house?
3 cell phones and 4 house phones
What do you do when you're sad?
Talk to Mel and listen to music and read and other more self-destructive things.
Who would you call first if you won the lottery?
Ummmmmmmmmmmmm... I don't know.
Last time you saw your best friend?
Which one? < Ditto
Are you in high school?
Yes...
What jewelry are you wearing?
A watch and a lip ring.
Is anyone on your bad side now?
Homework is.
What's the first thing you do when you get online?
Open facebook, xanga and hotmail.
Do you watch Grey's Anatomy?
No, I watch House.
How do most people spell your name?
Alexa, but sometimes I get Alexandra, Alesia, Alexis...
Would you wear a boy/girlfriends clothes?
Yes.
Where do you work?
Err... Don't have a job.
What are you doing tomorrow?
It's Mel's birthday so I'm going to the actual school for lunch and going to a restaurant, then I believe we are going to her house.
Is Justin Timberlake becoming the next Michael Jackson?
Only if he starts getting a lot paler and a lot deader... < lmao
Favorite name for a girl?
I have a few, but currently it's Mika.
Favorite name for a boy?
Uh... I don't know.
Will you keep your last name when you get married?
Good question... I don't know. I like my last name, but I don't like the way it ties me to my father. I am agent 007! *whips out invisible gun* :D
When was the last time you left your house?
Yesterday
Do you return your cart?
Yes.
Do you have a dishwasher?
Yes, thank god!!!
What noise do you hear?
Plane.
Would you survive in prison?
Hahahahha! ha. ha, no.
Who is the youngest in your family?
In my immediate family, my sister. In my extended family, my sister. (She hates being the baby)
If all of your friends were going on a road trip, who would most likey overpack?
Me.
Do you know anyone with the same name as you?
I've never met another person with the same name except recently. Theres a 4 year old (I think) that lives 3 houses down from me.. she's cute.
What's the last thing you purchased?
Food at Thai Express.
Do your siblings ever pay for stuff for you?
Hahahahahahahaha.. no.
What brand are your pants right now?
I don't know.
Ever been to Georgia (the state)?
Nope.
What irritates you most on the internet?
When I can find whatever I'm searching for while doing a research project.
What brand is your digital camera?
I don't know.
Do you watch movies with your parents?
Sometimes.
What song best describes your life right now?
Um.... I don't know. Smother Me by The Used (Okay I know!! The Used. Whatever it's a good song!) and and and and I like I Know You Are But What Am I? by Mogwai
Do you own expensive perfume/cologne?
Yes, I've had it for 3 years. I don't want it to go away, so I only used it once in a while.
Are you taking college classes right now?
None.
Do you like sushi?
No.
Do you get your hair cut every month?
No.
Do you go online everyday?
Yeah.. pretty much.
Wow, I said "sometimes" I shitload of times in this survey. Whatever, I do that sometimes... you know, like sometimes you get a word in your head and sometimes you keep using it, cos it's in your head.
Okay I'll stop now... bye
Wednesday, 28 October 2009
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Poem
Here is a poem written by my cousin, Sacha Bond. He is currently in jail in the US. We have been trying for years to get him transfered back to Canada so that he can be treated for his bipolar, which led to the incident during a 10 visit to the US. Anyways, here it is. (Okay I know that there are a couple spelling mistakes, but he's French)
As I sit here in a daze, pondering my existance wondering what is in store for me in the furture.
I think, 20 years of agony for a mistake, created by my insanity, impuls, fear and alcohol all intertwind!
I sit here and think were they really going to rob me that night or was that night fealing the cold steal of my 38 revolver that I had packed at my lower back.
I could take there lives before they take mine.
I sit here in a daze wondering if only I would have taken my medication that my mother gave me, I would have been asleep and and my future would have been restored,
I would be at home in a comfortable bed, not sleeping on hard steal, not here, not now, rotting in a cell,with the rest of the world’s trash.
I sit here in a daze thinking I had it good out there , but fear took it away and no way of getting it back.
I sit here in a daze thinking that at times my sanity has been restored but at times feels as if I might lose it again reality becomes fantasy , anger becomes pain ,
my body shakes as I pace my cell back and forth, not knowing if this is a dream or are they breaking me? Not knowing how/where and when.
As I sit here in a daze I try not to think of what I could have been in 20 years,
but I know one thingI would surely had been dead by now, using all those drugs to ease my pain created by my emotional turmoil, oh the pain, the pain.
As I site here in a daze I close my eyes to see the faces of my loved one that have never turned there backs upon me, they will stay with me till the end , my judgement day has come and still they stay by my side to protect me from my demons.
As I sit here in a daze my anger has gone, I am at peace I love and shal be loved, I am at peace my name is Sacha Bond and Justice will be served
by Sacha Bond ,
Dade Correctional institution ,
Florida City, Fl. K06444 -F2214
I thought I would share. I miss him.
http://www.justice4sachabond.org/
If you want to know more about his story here's another link
http://www.ctv.ca/servlet/ArticleNews/story/CTVNews/20070510/whistleblower_koval_070517/20070517?hub=TopStories -
I am he as you are he as you are me
and we are all together! :)
[85 Pictures]
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<GREAT movie!
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I wish I could say with eloquence (much like you can) how much you mean to me, how much I love you, how much happiness you've brought to my life, but I can't.
All I can say is that I love so much, I can't even express the amount of love I have for you.
You mean the world to me. I haven't been this happy in years. Even before I started this uphill battle with bipolar.
I love you so much and I'm so lucky to have you here. In my life.
I want to be with you right now.
You're amazing and I'm going to make you believe it.
Monday, 26 October 2009
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Song of the day!
I'm going to put the original version and the one from the movie (as usual)
Song: I am the Walrus
Artist: The Beatles/ Bono and the cast from Across the Universe
I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together.
See how they run like pigs from a gun, see how they fly.
I'm crying.
Sitting on a cornflake, waiting for the van to come.
Corporation tee-shirt, stupid bloody tuesday.
Man, you been a naughty boy, you let your face grow long.
I am the eggman, they are the eggmen.
I am the walrus, goo goo g'joob.
Mister city policeman sitting
Pretty little policemen in a row.
See how they fly like lucy in the sky, see how they run.
I'm crying, i'm crying.
I'm crying, i'm crying.
Yellow matter custard, dripping from a dead dog's eye.
Crabalocker fishwife, pornographic priestess,
Boy, you been a naughty girl you let your knickers down.
I am the eggman, they are the eggmen.
I am the walrus, goo goo g'joob.
Sitting in an english garden waiting for the sun.
If the sun don't come, you get a tan
From standing in the english rain.
I am the eggman, they are the eggmen.
I am the walrus, goo goo g'joob g'goo goo g'joob.
Expert textpert choking smokers,
Don't you thing the joker laughs at you?
See how they smile like pigs in a sty,
See how they snied.
I'm crying.
Semolina pilchard, climbing up the eiffel tower.
Elementary penguin singing hari krishna.
Man, you should have seen them kicking edgar allan poe.
I am the eggman, they are the eggmen.
I am the walrus, goo goo g'joob g'goo goo g'joob.
Goo goo g'joob g'goo goo g'joob g'goo.
Wednesday, 21 October 2009
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Song of the day!
Original version and the version from Across The Universe
Song: While My Guitar Gently Weeps
Artist: The Beatles/Cast from Across the Universe
I look at you all see the love there that's sleeping
While my guitar gently weeps
I look at the floor and I see it need sweeping
Still my guitar gently weeps
I don't know why nobody told you
how to unfold you love
I don't know how someone controlled you
they bought and sold you
I look at the world and I notice it's turning
While my guitar gently weeps
With every mistake we must surely be learning
Still my guitar gently weeps
I don't know how you were diverted
you were perverted too
I don't know how you were inverted
no one alerted you
I look at you all see the love there that's sleeping
While my guitar gently weeps
I look at you all
Still my guitar gently weeps
Oh, oh, oh
oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
oh oh, oh oh, oh oh
Yeah yeah yeah yeah
yeah yeah yeah yeah
Monday, 19 October 2009
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qwerty
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I love her so much. I think she is absolutely beautiful and I hope she doesn't question that.
You know I'll remind you, hun! I'm going to drill it in your head till you believe me. :) -
Song of the day!
If you want the scene from the movie here's the link (I couldn't embed it)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NAHPPOKqzcE
Song: We Started This Op'ra Shit
Artist: Repo! The Genetic Opera
Band Leader:
Everybody, everybody!
Everybody:
Get up! Get up!
Band Leader:
Oh yeah! S-s-s-stand up!
Everybody:
Don't be shy!
Band Leader:
Hah, hah! People, people, people!
Everybody:
Get up! Get up! Get up!
Band Leader:
Whoo! Everybody, everybody...
Everybody:
Testify!
Band Leader:
...everybody!
Band Leader:
Get down, get down now. S-s-s-stand up!
Don't be shy. People, people, people! Cut up, get up, get up! Everybody testify!
Singers:
(Vocalize)
Band Leader:
Testify!
Singers:
(Vocalize)
Everybody:
Testify!
Singers:
(Vocalize)
Band Leader:
Testify!
Singers:
(Vocalize)
Band Leader:
State your name!
Genterns:
Genterns...genterns...genterns...(orgasmic sounds)
Luigi:
S-s-s-s-s-s-saved!
Band Leader:
Everybody, everybody get down get down now! S-s-s-s-stand up!
Don't be shy! People, people, people! Get up, get up, get up!
Everybody, everybody test-i-fy!
Single Mother:
I needed a kidney transplant desperately. Genco showed this single mom sympathy.
This makeover came for a small added fee. Now I look smashing on live t.v!
Rotti:
Be healed!
Band Leader, Pavi, and Luigi:
You know you want it baby, genco's got it! You know you want it baby, genco's got it!
Rotti:
(Vocalizes)
Genterns:
I really need it.
Band Leader, Pavi, and Luigi:
You know you want it baby, genco's got it!
Genterns:
I've got to have it. All I need is surgery.
Everybody:
I was infected by my genetics.
Rotti:
Testify!
Everybody:
Now perfected by your cosmetics.
Rotti:
Testify!
Band Leader:
Hey hey, hey hey! Hey hey, hey hey!
Hey hey, hey hey!
Genterns:
All I need is surgery!
Band Leader:
Hey hey, hey hey!
Everybody:
I was infected by my genetics.
Genterns:
All I need is surgery!
Band Leader:
Hey, hey, hey hey! Everybody, everybody make your genetics your bitch!
Rotti:
Testify!
Friday, 16 October 2009
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I'm ridiculously excited!
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Song of the day!
I don't remember if I already posted this or not... but whatever.
Song: Detective Daughter
Artist: Emily Haines & The Soft Skeleton
She was calling around to find half an hour.
She walked right into my mirror.
Said she’s here to waste time, I said, “That’s fine.”
Listen to thy self, be true to thy self, be true to thy self, be true
Every thread, every hair rearranged to resemble you.
You could help her!
Detective daughter copy- please don’t be me.
There are so many skirts under the table.
None of these long legs are mine.
She calls around, finds me crying.
Wish I were capable of lying sometimes.
Hide out and run when no one’s looking.
Hide out.
Love is hell, hell is love.
Hell is asking to be loved.
She’s still calling around to find half an hour.
She’ll always have a place in my mirror.
She’s got no more time now she wants mine
but I’m all out too,
To thy self, be true to thy self, be true to thy self, be true.
aaaaaahhhhhhhhh
It's no big deal
insolent_existance
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- Name: Alexia
- Gender: Female
- Member Since: 9/17/2007
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Wow, I haven't cried that much in very long time. What the hell was wrong with me last night?
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I just woke up from an 8 hour nap. ---- Happy anniversary, baby!
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Going to see Metallica tonight!!!!!!!!! :D
